C is for Crap

Hey there, ‘Redheads… I saw something truly horrifying on TV yesterday. Given the amount of raw horror that spills out of the tube on a regular basis and how numb we’ve become to it, we’re not easily shocked anymore. Birds fall out of the sky? Ho hum. We’re jaded. But this nugget of odium came from an unlikely place: a diaper commercial…

Oh sure, it looks like a cute commercial, but think about what you just watched. A judged contest to see which child can take the more massive crap, on a stage in front of cheering fans that are snapping cell phone pictures. You see a cute baby cartoon. I see a grim window into the future of televised reality competitions. This does seem like the next logical step after competitive eating. And sure, some people in the crowd are there to cheer on their favorite baby but, just like people watch NASCAR to see the crashes, some sick bastards are there just to see a rupture. And in our world of manufactured celebrity, somebody will try to pass this off as a genuine spectator sport. Hey, everyone does it, right? UPS could sponsor. ABC will pass on it and FOX will add it to the line up after American Idol. You just watched and voted on people singing, now watch and vote on what comes out the other end. Yeesh.

Don’t let crap like that infect your soul. Come out to Magooby’s tonight to cleanse your soul with some comedy and charity. Right now, they’re roughly 22 hours into the 81 hour marathon. They need audience members. The show is FREE. Just drop something in the bucket for Special Olympics and you get as much comedy as you can handle. I’m on at 8pm tonight, followed by Ayanna Dookie, Rob Maher, and Mike Way.

See you there…

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